THE BATMAN (2022)

THE BATMAN (2022)

Tagline: Unmask The Truth

(Crime, Drama, Boring People Roaming Around In The Dark) [PG-13]

I'm starting to see now. I have had an effect here... but not the one I intended.

In this one, a man who comes to be known as “The Riddler” is killing people on camera and taunting Batman the entire time. At some point, Batman has to take time out from his usual "beating the crap out of people" schedule so that he can focus on “The Riddler” who says he is doing what he is doing to fight the city's corruption. 

First off, if you are looking for the sun in this movie, you can forget about it. There are maybe 3 seconds of daylight in this whole movie. Additionally, because half the cast is whispering, and in the dark, you might be able to put out a better movie with your iPhone and a flashlight filming in a cardboard box.  

When I first heard about this movie and saw the previews I was intrigued because Robert Pattinson has always struck me as a better actor than most people give him credit for. He proves that in this movie as well as others. In fact, performance-wise, no one in this movie is “conventionally bad”. The problem is just the tone and setting overall. Robert Pattinson is a better Batman than he is a “Bruce Wayne” in this film, but that doesn’t fix anything. I was also really excited about Matt Reeves directing because he killed it on WAR FOR THE PLANET OF THE APES and DAWN OF THE PLANET OF THE APES.  

Unfortunately, this movie is very slow, very long, and to be honest, you could leave the theater, go watch another movie and come back and be completely caught up, because nothing happens in this movie for huge chunks of time. I don’t hate long movies, but they have to at least not “feel” long. This feels like attending a funeral. Even as a detective story this is about as simplistic as an episode of Scooby-Doo! once you cut through the tedious and brooding dialog. 

Regarding the cast, we do get a pretty good one. I don’t think I have seen very many movies where Zoe Kravitz gets much screen time, but she does a good job as Selina Kyle (a.k.a. Catwoman) even with the downgraded and far less interesting Catwoman suit (when compared to DARK KNIGHT RISES version). This wasn’t her first time as Catwoman though, she also voices the character in THE LEGO BATMAN MOVIE. Paul Dano who plays “The Riddler” is sufficiently creepy in this thing and is a diverse actor. What I couldn’t stand is that they made him a serial killer and focused a lot of the story just around him and how much you just wanted the movie to end. His character is part of what sucked all the life out of this thing. I love Andy Serkis for the most part, but his turn as Alfred is probably the worst we’ve seen theatrically. Jeffrey Wright is solid as James Gordon and is almost the “Robin” persona in this movie taking a more active role than most other on-screen iterations. I won’t get into the rest of the cast, but Colin Farrell probably does have the stand-out performance here as Oz (aka The Penguin). I was actually pretty shocked and even more impressed when I found out it was him, they did such a great job with the prosthetics and makeup. 

Overall what we get here is a bit of a detective horror flick with zero fun or soul. I am glad it takes place in a bit of an alternate universe from the main DCU (DC Comics Universe) movies because this thing is a drab damp dark downer of a movie that I would rather have skipped. 

I give THE BATMAN a 2 out of 7 which sucks because I was pretty excited to see it in spite of some of the more scathing reviews. 

GRAPHICS ARE THE PROPERTY OF WARNER BROS. AND ARE USED FOR REVIEW PURPOSES ONLY. 

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