KONG ISLAND (1968)

KONG ISLAND (1968)

Tagline: From the forest came the terror of...

(Sci-Fi, Adventure, My Gorillas Can Take Over The Word!) [R]

Note: The movie wasn’t given an MPAA rating, but it if was it likely would have landed a R just due to brief nudity. This movie was also known as KING OF KONG ISLAND. Having “KONG” anything in this film's title makes no sense because there is nothing “KONG” about it. 

You're an excellent specimen of the human race - strong, clever, brave. That's why I've chosen you for my first experiment on a human being. You'll have the honor of being the first man to become my slave.

This story takes us to the jungle (baby...you're gonna diiieeee!!!...just kidding) where explorer and big game hunter Burt Dawson is just minding his own business pissing off PETA (and really everyone that hates hunting where you aren’t going to at least eat what you hunt). Then suddenly he is sent on a new chase to go save Diana who has been kidnapped by mind controlled gorilla. Along the way, he befriends a jungle girl raised by those same apes whom he decides to call Eva, because why not? However, the mad scientists controlling the gorilla want to use them to take over the world, so they are going to do everything in their power to stop Burt, the dude that just mindlessly kills big game for no apparent reason at all. I don’t even think he is going to eat that jaguar if he kills it. Because he’s a big jerk. 

First off, to be clear, I am not anti-hunting. I am anti big game hunting for things you are never going to eat. I am also not a hunter at all, I am saying I just don’t have anything against it if you are going to eat what you kill. With that out of the way, we need to get to this freakin movie. 

Somewhere deep in this thing is a bit of a sci-fi film. There are mad scientists trying to rule the world with apes, but it seems like mostly the producers just had some stock footage, gorilla outfits, an actress who didn’t mind being topless because she had long hair, and really wanted to use it to make a jungle movie. 

Acting wise Esmeralda Barros plays Eva in this and although I haven’t seen any of her other films which include such friendly-sounding titles like KISS THE GIRLS AND MAKE THEM DIE, and MAY GOD FORGIVE YOU…BUT I WON’T. Acting wise she isn’t asked to do much other than just show up in the movie scantily clad. Brad Harris shows up as Burt Dawson and does a decent job. Harris was a huge man and that definitely played into him playing Goliath in 1961 and Hercules in 1983. Ursula Davis (CRYPT OF THE VAMPIRE) is okay as Diana, but to be honest no one in this movie was aiming for critical acclaim. 

We do get one villain aside from the mad scientist in what seems to be an attempt to get a plot crammed in, but there is zero depth to any of it. The film is considered horror sci-fi I guess, but after the 1950s, I think there was no one left on the planet that was frightened by guys in ape suits with cuts in the sides of their heads. 

Overall this one is pretty bad. My copy came with a set of 50 films done by Mill Creek as part of a sci-fi collection. I appreciate that they put these movies on DVD, but the copy is crap. I think this must have been a common complaint because a lot of other studios putting out older films have been taking the time to at least restore them in HD etc. A few of examples of distributors doing a better job at updating things copies of older and rare films are SHOUT FACTORY, VINEGAR SYNDROME, and CRITERION. 

Anyway, this thing is terrible. I give it a 1 out of 7. I wouldn’t bother. 

GRAPHICS ARE THE PROPERTY OF THREE STAR FILMS AND ARE USED FOR REVIEW PURPOSES ONLY.