GODZILLA 1985 (1985)
For the sake of this review, I am looking at the Japanese version of the film and not the Raymond Burr American version. The reason for this is not that I hate Raymond Burr, it’s just because I don’t currently own the movie, so I watched it on the Channel 62 app which has the Japanese version with an American dub. So that is what’s going on here.
A reporter investigates the disappearance of a ship and ends up finding some freakishly horrifying stuff as well as a giant sea louse. At first I was thinking, nice, Godzilla is going to fight a bunch of sea louse’s but nope. That isn’t how it goes. A survivor then tells the reporter that the ship was attacked by Godzilla so apparently Godzilla should have a bunch of giant sea louse on him? Nope, that doesn’t happen either. Of course Soviet nuclear submarine is jacked up because this was the 80’s and that was just perfect. They blame the US and now it’s time to fight? Nope, that doesn’t happen either. The Japanese, let everyone know that it was Godzilla because you know…who else? Soon the Japan and the rest of the world are on red alert as they wait for Godzilla to begin just destroying everything he sees.
So we end up just getting a pretty lame remake of the original where Godzilla fights nothing except boring humans and that is pretty much it. I have to say, I couldn’t stand this damn thing when it came out and I am a full blown Godzilla fan whose been watching these things since 77’ when I was 4 years old. So if I was massively disappointed, you have to know a lot of other G-Fans were as well.
To its credit the creators did try some new things. Godzilla got a decent updated look, but they introduced ridiculously embarrassing animatronics for some shots. So I have to give them points for having the “guts” to try and move the franchise forward. I also just can’t handle the way this movie ends, but if you haven’t seen it, at least check it out so that you can be just as underwhelmed as I was.
What makes this movie even more hard to handle is the fact that the first 20 minutes are wildly intriguing and really get you hyped for something great. We do also get a pretty cool scene where Godzilla is just toasting an entire bay at night.
I sadly have to give this one a 2 out of 7. It’s just not anything I can say “run out there and excited watch this thing”. Now as a Godzilla you “should” watch it, even go through the effort of watching both the US and Japanese versions, but then maybe get that bad tastes out of your mouth by watching GODZILLA VS BIOLANTE which is the film that directly follows this one. Because even that mediocre movie is better than this thing.
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