SUMMERHOUSE SLAUGHTER (2023)

SUMMERHOUSE SLAUGHTER (2023)

Tagline: Nope

(Horror, Cheerleading, Piles Of Cheese) [R]

Note: This movie is also known as CHEERLEADER CAMP:  TO THE DEATH. I am guessing that was an attempt to capitalize on 1988’s CHEERLEADER CAMP. This movie was not given an MPA rating, but it would have drawn a [R] rating. The movie was filmed in 2014 but didn’t come out till 2023.

Oh and mom, I don’t think I want to be a cheerleader anymore….

In this one, a group of 6 cheerleading prospects is at cheerleading camp just trying to cheer or whatever. I don’t really know; I have never been to cheerleader camp. It doesn’t take long before the girls start to get picked off one by one by a panda mascot. The murders appear to be tied to a freak murder at a similar camp a year earlier, that killed all the girls except Tanya who wasn’t there. Now Tanya the designated captain, must band together with her rivals to try and find out who is doing the killing now. 

In this one it is pretty clear in this movie is that they were going for an 80s or early 90s feel. The lighting matches the era and the soundtrack is definitely intended to create that vibe. The practical effects also definitely scream 80s. One weird thing about the streaming version of the movie is that they decided to throw in an Elvira-looking host named Malyolia to pipe in about what is going on as part of Malyolia’s Movie Matinee. I guess she’s fine, but it felt really unnecessary for a movie that is only 70 minutes long and maybe 5 of those minutes are her. 

As far as plot, there really isn’t much of one which is fine. They do spend a little time giving the background story, but there isn’t really any character development that draws you to the characters. Everyone just kind of treats Tanya like crap, especially Courtney.  At one point one of the girls says that they have no idea where they are? That seems pretty odd that anyone would go to a cheerleading camp or anywhere without at least having an idea of where it is? 

Acting wise almost everyone is pretty janky. We do get Jennifer Banko for a few brief scenes as Coach Paddington. She is most famous for playing “young Tina” in FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VII: THE NEW BLOOD. Julia Farrell plays Tanya and does just okay. Julia is most famous for RETURN OF THE ROBO-MUMMY FROM OUTER SPACE PART 7. Jazmyne Van Houten gets a lot of lines as Courtney and actually has a very tiny amount of character growth, but the acting is rough. I did like Karrie Bauman in this as Sophia. Bauman was also in THE LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK. 

The writing is wonderfully bad, but there are a few scenes in her at the end that are pretty hilarious. The dialog does admit that there is practically no motive for anything that goes on in this movie. If you just look at this as a silly 80’s style slasher, it’s actually kind of fun even in its simplicity. Definitely don’t walk into this expecting quality, it was distributed by WILD EYE and nothing that comes from them seems to be of high quality. 

Overall just the feel of this movie was better than a lot of B-movie horror out there. For that reason, I have to give this a 4 out of 7. Plus, I like pandas.

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