THE WEAPON (2023)
Tagline: Nope.
(Action, Thriller, How Not to Write a Script) [R]
In this one a man named Dallas trained to kill is on a rampage revolving around a man named Lars who has basically abducted his girlfriend Iris. In a world of bikers and mob bosses, Dallas is coming and he’s gonna jack you up if you get in his way. So I’m just saying watch out. I mean it, just step aside.
All kidding aside. This is one of the worst movies of 2023. I really don’t see a way it will escape my WORST 10 MOVIE OF 2023 list this year. The movie's protagonist Dallas (played by Tony Schiena) comes across as one of the characters JOHN WICK would kill, dust off, have a coffee, then go back to killing all in the span of 25 seconds.
One thing I can’t really harp on is the acting. I think people read the scripts they were given, but the storytelling for the most part is super jumpy, and even the simplicity of the overall storyline is needlessly told out of order to create some sort of effect? I have no idea. Sometimes I don’t mind this way of getting your story told, but in this thing, you feel the angst of trying to put this puzzle together. No visual cues are given we are just supposed to figure out how all these characters are related and determine what is even going on. Because a LOT of these characters are shady, the film almost forces you to conclude that everyone, including Dallas, is just a total whacko. Dallas even pretty much just tells us he’s not a good person. At that point, if I was in the theater I would have just checked out and gone to get a popcorn refill.
Acting wise AnnaLynne McCord plays Iris and isn’t really given much to do here. She is basically just telling Lars what’s up and he seems to just be treating her kind of like a pet. It’s all just pretty damn weird. McCord is probably best known for TRANSPORTER 2. Richard Grieco (CATS DANCING ON JUPITER) is decent but not great in this as Lars. He’s been acting since the ’80s, but fits this role pretty well I think. Granted, all these characters are terrible people. Movie fans will also notice Cuba Gooding Jr. (JERRY MAGUIRE) is on the cover of this. He seems to have moved past his legal troubles guilty or not and has started acting again. Fans of his will be greatly disappointed in this one though. He is only in this movie for maybe 3 minutes.
This film falls into the category of low-budget direct-to-streaming action movies that has seen a resurgence lately and it’s definitely one of the worst. I think that the idea was to try and create a series around this character because this movie doesn’t even have an ending. It basically just finds a place to stop and stops with nothing really resolved at all. It feels like half an episode of whatever bad show you can think of. We don’t even get a full story and there is nearly no character development. There is a flashback where Dallas is kind of reminiscing about why he got into trying to kill everyone who looks at him funny, but it’s really character development or even much of a backstory.
Overall this was an 85-minute waste of my time. For the love of all that is holy, please skip this.
THE WEAPON gets a 1 out of 7. That's it, that's the review on this one.
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